Getting Over Heartache? The Do's and Don'ts
by Susan Russo

"Whether you think you can or you think you can't- you're right." -Henry Ford

Feeling overwhelmed by the loss of someone you love? Wondering how you are going to make it through another day?

When going through the process of getting over a broken heart one thing is definitely clear; your thoughts are controlled by your emotions. You literally can't think straight. Common sense isn't so common.

You desperately want answers as to why, how and when did everything change. The last thing you want to do is the one thing you need to do; which is to let go and move on.

Your mind may play games with you in thinking about how you can fix this mess in which you find yourself. You just know that there is something you can do to get them back in your life and make things right.

If they could only understand how you feel then maybe they will come back and try one more time. You conjure up tactics to bring back this lost love; generally to no avail.

Making excuses to see them or talk to them one more time becomes an art.

You just know that he or she misses you and using that last ditch attempt may just be the key that will clinch the deal. So, you arrange the I-just-want-to-talk-to-you-one-more-time meeting in hopes that you will turn things around.

Typically, this meeting produces two results. Number one: You're one day further away from getting over them. And number two: Now you are more certain that this relationship really is over. You probably didn't hear what you wanted and the outcome wasn't what you desired.

You may even sleep with them one more time which would be a mistake. Although you may think it might change things, the only thing that changes is that you lose a little dignity.

When your choices are clouded by your emotions the consequences can be painful. This is the time that you need to rely on the advice of your friends and family. They aren't the ones who are blinded by their feelings. Their objective viewpoint is exactly what you need.

Perk up and listen to what they are telling you. They love you and will help you in doing what is best for you.

If you are struggling with what to do and what not to do following is a list to help guide you when you find yourself heading down the one-way street to nowhere.

Don't call him or her!...This will only set you back. Do call a friend...call anyone, but don't call him or her.

Don't sit around by yourself every night. Do keep yourself as busy as you can.

Don't make excuses to see him or her one more time. Do make a clean break...in the long run it's easier on you.

Don't second guess yourself. Do know it ended for a reason...even if you don't know what the reason is yet.

Don't blame yourself...it always takes two. Do learn a lesson from this relationship

Don't become bitter, no one is worth it. Do know the end is a new beginning.

Don't dwell on the past...if it's over, it's over. Do focus on what you want your life to look like.

Don't give in...everything is going to be okay. Do allow yourself the time to heal.

Don't feel like you will never recover. Do begin to love yourself more.

Hopefully some of these ideas will keep you on the right track. Breaking up is hard to do. But, you can and will survive this heartache.

I know it hurts now, but if you continue the on-again-off-again dance you will only prolong the inevitable.

Allow yourself the chance to heal, take it a day at a time and know in your heart that there really is life after what's-their-name.

Warm wishes…Susan

PLEASE BOOKMARK THIS PAGE BEFORE YOU LEAVE

Top of page | Back to Articles | Home