Are You Your Best Friend?
by Susan Russo

"You, yourself, as much as anybody else in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection." -Buddha

Are you your own best friend or you own worst enemy? I often hear people putting themselves down and beating the verbal crap out of themselves that it makes me wonder if they are ever nice to themselves.

My business partner has been beating herself up because she has gained some weight and she thinks she is looking old.

The size 4's she normally wears are tight on her and she's crying about it! Please! Plus, the reality is we're all going to get older on the outside so make sure the little person on the inside learns to accept it.

Are you nice to yourself or do you constantly find fault with yourself? Are you too fat, too old, too dumb, too short, too tall, too new at this, too poor, too sure you won't meet someone and on and on. What is it that you keep saying to yourself that is preventing you from having a really nice day?

Remember when you were younger and you thought you had problems? Well, the truth is life probably wasn't so bad and it's still the truth. It's not so bad now either but we spend so much time focused on what we don't like about ourselves or our lives that we forget about how good we have it.

Today is the day that you should begin to accept yourself right where you are with all of the things that you can't seem to live with or don't like about yourself. Today is the day to love yourself just a little bit more and stop putting yourself down.

How do you think putting yourself down will make you feel? How do you think being kinder to yourself will make you feel?

Your self esteem takes a hit every time you take a swing at it. And don't think for a second that constantly being mean to yourself doesn't take it's toll.

How about the fact that what you focus on you attract to yourself. So, all of that negative energy, all of that negative talk and all of the verbal flagellation is keeping you stuck in a perpetual unhappiness.

So why do it? Does it make you feel better or worse? Does it help you achieve what you want or does it have a tendency to not only keep you stuck but make you feel worse because nothing has changed?

If you heard someone talking to your child or friend in a demeaning, nasty way, what would you do? Would you just stand by or would you step in and say, "Who do you think you are talking to her/him this way? Get out of here and don't come back." Well, start to tell your "mean self" exactly that the next time you start taking jabs at yourself.

Sure, there are things we might wish were different but unless you learn to accept yourself with all of the good and the perceived bad, then you'll never have a good relationship with yourself.

Be your own best friend. Learn to be nice to yourself right where you are in life, right now. You'll start to be more confident, your days will look brighter and each day will be less stressful and sad.

Start to thank God/Allah/Higher Power for ALL of your blessings. Stop focusing on what you don't like about your life and see yourself as the precious gift you are to the rest of us.

Learning to really love yourself will be the best gift you give to yourself and it will allow you to become you very own best friend!

Warm wishes…Susan

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