Burying Your Head in the Sand?
by Susan Russo

"Everytime I close the door on reality, it comes in through the windows." -Jennifer Yane

When you choose to avoid dealing with life's circumstances regardless of what it is, it ultimately either silently eats you alive or hurts the other people who need you to deal with it.

Whether it's your own issues such as unhealthy relationships, procrastination, weight lying to yourself, destructive habit, or whatever the case may be or if it's the people we are the closest to and we don't want to deal with their pain and all of the emotions that go along with it, burying your head won't help anyone or anything.

Children for instance don't have a voice when they are exposed to abuse, by you not dealing with your own ugly affairs you impose upon these kids unwanted emotions and feelings that isn't only unfair to them but it puts them in a miserable situation that they really don't deserve or have anything to do with. They are the victims.

Or if you have co-workers, friends or family members who are hurting but you are too busy to get involved, that 5 minutes you may lend a hand or an ear may be all they need to feel better.

There's no question that dealing with confrontations or any of life's adversities isn't any fun, but sweeping them under the rug can make you fat, sad, depressed, delusional, out of touch or just plain empty. This escape mechanism may work in the short run, i.e. avoiding the immediate pain, but in the end it all catches up to you in one way or another.

Or course there is the opposite of avoidance and that is the consummate dweller. The person who thrives on worry and can't let go of thinking about the situation. They consume themselves with what if, if only, should I, could I, what if I do and what if I don't. These people don't bury their head in the sand they bury it in fear and paralyze themselves.

So how do you dig yourself out of the sand, meet somewhere in the middle and make it okay to deal with the realities of life?

First, you have to be honest about life and know that it isn't always going to be easy street for yourself or those you love. Then you have to deal with it. Period. Know that avoiding it doesn't make it go away and eventually you will have to deal with it anyway.

By confronting problems whether they are yours or not brings relief and some clarity to the situation. It helps you move off of square one and helps to get you or others unstuck from believing their is no solution.

And, many times not only does it bring about significant changes it ultimately helps to eliminate the issues and then you don't have anything to bury your head in the sand about anymore!!

So the next time you want to run and hide when your own garbage starts to wreak or someone else is looking for direction, embrace it head on, say your piece and then let it go. Just deal with it!

That little act of dealing with what ails you or others will not only help you or them but it will release you from the stress that goes along with avoidance. And, there is nothing quite like facing reality, letting it go and moving on.

Warm wishes…Susan

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